Friends or more?
I met this Pisces guy through friends. First I didnt think much of him as he seemed pretty cold, but as we saw each other here and there, mostly social gatherings, I started receiving hints that he may like me. I was dating another man at the time, as this Pisces guy started hitting on me, complimenting me, wanting to hang out more and confide in me with more of his personal stories. I started feeling an intellectual connection which eventually turned into a crush.
He was always there to listen to me, and he always stayed close, providing emotional support, listening to what I had to say, and wanting to spend time together just the two of us. He never asked me on a date though. I really liked him and told him I did at which point he backed off and said he only liked me as a very close friend. I know he’s just been out of a hurtful relationship and is trying to move on. His attitude towards me hasnt changed a bit.
He still watches me, protects me, invites me for tea and talk at his place and gives me the longest and tightest hugs ever. He has talked to a few of mutual friends about me about how he’s impressed with my professional achievements. Long story short, this guy gives every hint of being interested, yet he’s not stepping forward. What should I do? Are pisces men really that kind and intimate with their female friends?
To start off, from my personal perspective to your question of can a person like me be that kind or intimate with a person who we have no interest in pursuing a relationship with it’s kind of a yes and a no. Yes in the sense of if that person really needs me then it’s like I am willing to give you my energy per se. But that is coming from the mindset that you really need it and I feel I can offer it. If you are telling me he is just giving you all this attention and the long hugs where you don’t “need” or “want” it then I would say that something is odd.
With your point about him trying to move on and assuming he has good intentions and all I am inclined to say at this point it feels like him giving you that care is a way for him to repair himself too. Example, the confidence of knowing one is needed/wanted. Stereo typically speaking too if you tell me that he hugs you and does more in that moment such as smelling your hair then I can say he definitely sees you as more than a friend.
In my mind, if the scenario is accurate where he likes you more I wouldn’t approach you either to take the next step of a traditional date. As I usually say, your “date” is basically the person spending time with you like that. That then leads to the other topic of “do I have to wait forever” routine. That’s a personal choice, but I know for myself if you made the move in a subtle way the guy should be intuitive enough to know what is going on. If he reacts to it then you react back. If he consistently doesn’t then he really doesn’t want to go further.
So if I were you I would first change your perception of a “date” and instead treat this whole time process with him as the “date.” You can essentially get one indirectly to tell you if they want to go forward by digging into their values. How do they see their future? What do they like in people? Pet peeves? Don’t do it in an interview way of course but if the person they describe is you essentially then you know with everything else you wrote they just don’t want to take initiative. Do you have an idea what his vision of a “great girl for him” is as an example? If not use this process to find out.