He brokeup with me and blocked me
I’m feeling so lost right now. My ex brokeup with me 2months ago.
We knew each other for 6years already. In the first 3years, he was chasing me and in the middle i kind of liked him a little and backed off. Only after that we got together. This is both our first relationship, he is a pisces and i’m a gemini. He told he he like me being a sharing and caring person. Th first year together we are very sweet and spend alot of time together, we didnt even think of other things like games or friends.
Until recent years, i became more stress in work and very needy. I needed his attention as ever since i got into this relationship, i started losing my friends. All i have in my life is just work and him. When ever he is on off i would set my schedule free ao we can hang out together. I thought i my was common and fine until he started wanting to hang out with his friends and wanting to play games with them. I felt really sad like he was stolen from me. So i became more controlling towards him.
In this relationship i was like the man, always taking carecof everything , making plans and spending everything on him. Like buying him ps4, nmd and even plan trips and paid by me. I shower him with all my love that i dont even remember myself.
We started to have more fights and i will always just use breakup as an excuse to make him apologise to me. Until 3 months ago, we really brokeup. We didnt talk to each other for a month. After that we decided to have a closure and th me closure actually got us back together again. But end up fights still goes on and he decided to breakup with me, for the very first time. I couldn’t take it. It felt like the end of the world to me. The guy who said he will never leave me and want me in all his future plans just left. He say he have no more feelings for me and already moved on.
I felt like dying, and i had thoughts of ending my life. Each time his parents tries to talk sense into him he will just flare up. His friends all agreed with him leaving me. Initially he say we could be friends until one day he started talking to another girl, and i honestly got crazy. I told his mum about her as his mum still kept in contact with me. But one day he saw the msges and he was pissed off, he scolded me and told me to fuck off from his life, saying i was toxic and bad for him. After that, he blocked me on all social media and whatsapp.
Till today, 2months he still didnt unblock me and is still texting on daily basis with that girl he only knew for 2months. The girl keep complaining about me to him and i dont even know what is she trying to do. She knew about our situation and she still decided to text him. She is acting innocent to him making him hate me even more. His parents knew about it and is super unhappy with that 5years old younger girl.
He still kept all the things i bought and even using them. I really dont believe he have no more feelings for me. Im sure he just hide them and force himself to move on. What should i do? When will he unblock me and will he come back to me? I am sure nobody out there can give him so much attention and love, knowing how to takecare of him and accept him fully. But everyone told me he is still new and lack of experience so he needs to go out and fall before he will appreciate me. I still love him so much and i am literally experiencing emotional trauma for the past 2 months. I lost interest in everything, and i hate this girl so much.
How long does he need. Will he come back? Is it easy for a pisces to forget their first love where they love the hardest?
For myself personally once I leave a person unfortunately it is truly goodbye. The only exception for me is if I never say “forgave” someone before where I give the benefit of the doubt that it was a one time thing. But once I get that experience in life where the person did it again I am pretty much set to trust my intuition and not even give people the chance again in that way. It sounds like he kind of went through that scenario already with you.
Is it easy to forget the person you loved the hardest you ask? Well, technically yes if you never fully dropped his walls 100%. Speaking for myself that “guard” is how a person like me can turn things on and off like a switch. If you were able to get the person to completely drop their guard you bet it hurts like everyone else. But that’s usually why a person like myself is passive and all because in a sense I learned to be able to express and experience the same emotions that anyone else would while still having a guard per se which is understandably odd to many when you think about it.
Might not be the answer you want but I think you need to treat this as if he is gone and simply work on being happy in life without being dependent on him to do so if that makes sense. Because if it was me in this case I have to see consistency in your character that you have changed dramatically without ulterior motives. Example, you helped that charity consistently every day because you want to as opposed to knowing the person you want to impress is watching. To do that means you need to live your life and be true to yourself.
If you think about it too even for yourself you wouldn’t want this guy if he ends up just wanting to play games with others as opposed to being with you right? So you should in a way want to see if he naturally is a different person too. As evident, the way you both are as an individual simply isn’t a match by the sounds of it at this point in time. No need to stand in the dark hoping he will come back soon to light it up when you can just walk outside and potentially meet each other again if it was meant to be.