Is he protecting his heart?

Yaëlle Asks:

Hi,

Last year I met this pisces man at a party, we didnt even talk much. After the party he added me on facebook and we started talking. The conversations were so light, enjoyable and funny. We decided to meet up, we grabbed something to eat and went back to my place to talk. At this moment the pisces told me he really liked me and my personality is one of a kind( I’m a gemini). I didnt really think much of it as I found it to be a bit soon. As time went by we spoke every day through text and he wanted to see me every day but I was busy.

One day we decided to meet up, we were talking and all of a sudden he said I would like you to be my girlfriend. At that time I had just broken up with my ex and didnt want to get in a new relationship any time soon. I told him this and said if he liked we could try a friends with benefits situation. He agreed. As time was passing i started noticing that he still wanted me to be his girlfriend. Our connection began to grow deeper and I started thinking what if I gave it a try. So i started showing more affection and interest and thats when all of a sudden he started being distant. When i told him i liked him very much he would say things like i’m lying. One day we got into an big argument and I decided to end it. And i told him to not contact me at all because that is what he would usually do.

6 months went by with NC. And I really missed him so i contacted him again and he was surprised but also very happy i did. We met up this weekend and we spoke. He asked why i decided to contact him again and i told him i missed him. He told me he missed me very much but i told him not to contact me so he didn’t. The get together was fun and nice and it really made me see that I want to be in a relationship with him. But now he is a bit distant. Is this because he is trying to protect his heart? Or is it because he wants to see if i will put more effort in our ‘ relationship’ Also how should I let him know that I really love him and want to be with him without being too pushy.

Can you please tell me what the best way is to approach this situation

I really want to make it work this time and I really want to try my best to understand him better. I really feel like he is my soulmate. Even though they say Gemini and Pisces are not compatible at all.

Hope you can give me answers

Yaëlle,

My personal opinion is based on what you wrote this feels more like lust than love as they say in many ways. To me that explains like the hot and coldness of the relationship and is what I would personally say is causing the distance that you are asking about.

Generally speaking I would say if you want to show you really care for the person then that just means showing genuine interest in their life as well as allowing them to be in yours. From there if it is all genuine it should naturally fall in place. With your situation and assuming what I said was accurate then that means you need to focus a little more on things like his dreams and fantasy as this is about confidence in himself and feeling desired.

Like saying I am sure you can tell when someone really want to go to an event versus going to be socially polite. By the sounds of it there is a lot of physical attraction as an example and so I would imagine you have to keep that fresh and exciting in many ways. It’s almost like the mentality of wanting something you can’t have kind of excitement that it seems like he needs.