My Boyfriend

Harriet Asks:

Iam in a long distance relationship and just got back together with my boyfriend after 4 months of break up. He does not reply my msgs of call me at all . We talk for about 5 mins a week. When I asked him what was going on he told me that he is going through some things in his life and do no feel like taking most of the time . He won’t tell me what he’s going through or anything. I dnt know what else to do.

Harriet,

There isn’t very much details to work with here. My only real thought is that instead of trying to get him to say what is wrong try simply being positive or let him solve something for you. Example, only have five minutes with him? Instead of using it as a way to interrogate him think of something that would make him happy. From my experience this gets people to open up at times when they are in a dark place per se as your positivity can become infectious where they want more of it and so they open up to you.

The only thing is I don’t know this person personally to understand what exactly are the things in life that he really enjoys on a deeper level. Or, find something he can help you with and ask him for that help. You’d be surprised where many people in that state of mind can get a lot of fulfillment and confidence to then open up to you afterwards. Because in a way it’s like telling them “Hey, I trust you with my life” so in return for them it’s like “I trust you too.”