pisces man confusing
Reader Questions

Pisces Tattoo Artist

Amy Asks:

I am perplexed here. I had been crushing on this tattoo artist online before I met him and I was floored by how charming and sweet he was in person. Due to time contains, he partially finished my first of one tattoo and charged me for half of what he quoted for the pair. I was definitely flirty with him and he reciprocated it right back. He gave me his number and said that I can contact him any time for anything. I texted him so that he could have my number as well. Very soon after the tattoo session, he texted that he forgot to take a picture of the tattoo and asks me to send him one. I did and he said if I want to send him pics of any kind, that would be most welcome.

Long story short, we shared that we had been single for awhile and admitted our attraction to each other. I said that I did want to know him better and perhaps after the tattoo sessions are finished, we can. He said ok but wanted to trade pics. Against my better judgement, and with my raging libido’s encouragement I succumbed to reciprocating pics with him and that eventually led to hooking up. I went into it knowing this would be just sex and thought I could handle it since I’m moving out of state next month (he’s aware of this.) the sex was okay but towards the end, I started to feel cheap and used. I received one text from him afterwards that says that it was an “awesome!” time.

I was so disgusted w the experience but still wanted him to finish my tattoos so I merely replied with a smiley face. Since then I have not received one text from him except an occasional reply to a tattoo care question. I’m not an idiot, I get that he pursued me hard to get sex and dropped me like a hot potato once he got it. The problem is that with every passing day that he doesn’t text me or respond to my tattoo questions, I’m getting angered. I’m contemplating going to another tattoo artist to finish it but I really am a fan of the pisces’ work.

I asked him if he could finish everything this weekend since I have a lot going on with the move. Still no response. I’m contemplating on calling the shop to confirm the appointment tomorrow. He is part owner and answers the phone. I don’t want to seem stalkerish but this ignoring me thing is ridiculous and really starting to sting. I just want the tattoos to be done so I’ll never see him again! Advice on how to handle this would be much appreciated. I liked him but I didn’t really know him and I’m moving do that’s not going to happen. So why do I care if he’s ignoring me!!?? I am perplexed.


In my personal opinion I think it is important to first separate the business side of the relationship and the personal. Pardon my ignorance as I never got a tattoo, but isn’t he required to finish the job? If so, business wise I would first focus in documenting how you are trying to contact the ”business” with no luck. If they still fail to serve you then you can escalate it through other means such as leaving factual reviews of the business on places like the Better Business Bureau or even review sites like Yelp. Again though, separate business from personal. Who knows, maybe they will give you a refund and you can go elsewhere.

As for him, it does feel like he used you in a sense. And by the sounds of it, even you recognize this is probably a lost cause relationship wise. As to why you care that he is ignoring you, in my opinion you feel used and expected the best out of people. I would say the care comes from wanting your feelings to be heard and shared in an impacting way. Cause obviously as you say you felt dirty after the experience and it is something that is bottling you up. You kind of want him to understand/share your pain. But by the sounds of it, he isn’t going to be that guy and so you need to find another outlet.

People use the analogy of shaking a soda can and you can imagine what happens if you keep shaking it without allowing air to come out. Every time you don’t talk about it and he doesn’t respond it’s like someone is shaking the can more. I am not a doctor or anything so please keep that in mind. I am just telling you straight from the heart based on my personal life experiences.

So that would be my suggestion. Handle the business stuff in one way and for the personal hurt don’t rely on him to be your shoulder to cry on, so to speak. Find people that you can truly trust and respect in your life. It’s an unfortunate learning experience, but as they say everything in life makes you who you are and what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger.


  • Amy August 3, 2015

    Thank you for your feedback. I had previously contacted him on his personal phone number but I decided to delete that and called his shop. He answered and was friendly. Due to schedule conflicts, we made an appointment for the following week. He apologized for not getting back to me and said that he was “slammed.” He (and I) were very pleasant and professional on the phone and I hung up feeling relieved that he will finish my tattoo (which he couldn’t the first time due to my needing to leave for work.) I contemplated on telling him how I felt after that sexual experience after the tattooing session is finally done but, I don’t know. A part of me wants to act like I don’t care and not betray the vulnerability and struggle I felt about him. The other part demands closure and an apology from him for being less than respectful and so cavalier about it. it sounds like you’re encouraging me to not seek that from him however.

  • Amy August 3, 2015

    I guess I hoped that in person he would be more sensitive and caring since I read that Pisces have the tendency to send mixed signals by not texting but being much more caring in person. However since I received zero contact from him in regards to me personally, it is clear that he has no interest in me at all. I’m a Aqua girl and usually don’t attach much emotion to sex. However I’m in my late 30’s and have been experiencing a surge in my hormones and this my sex drive. It is as it I have the libido of an 18-year old boy with the emotions of a woman. Plus, I liked the guy. I feel like he took advantage of that. He zoomed right in on my interest and texted me constantly until I caved. I was flattered by the attention and did not handle myself in the way I usually do when I’m dating. At least, he reminded me of why I do not engage in casual sex. I’m thankful that I can still look at my tattoo and absolutely love the artwork. I remain a fan of his work but him as a person, not so much. He’s an asshole. Some say most artists are. Thanks Alan for your kind words and advice.

  • Amy August 13, 2015

    Hello again with the final update. The tat artist ended up canceling on me an hour before our appointment. I was fed up. I knew he had been at a convention all week and I knew of his love of alcohol, adderall and caffeine. The friend that messaged me on his behalf argued with me when I stated my disappointment and the words typed were verbatim. It was as if he/she was right next to him, making poor excuses by pointing that when I had to cancel an apt (with a full 24 hours advance notice and which I had given him a good tip by way of thanks after that first session.). As you said, I did blow up like a can of soda that had been shaken too much. I called the shop and spoke with the other tattoo artist regarding a refund since the tattoo had never been colored in. The other artist was very apologetic but explained what was paid is usually for the time spent in the chair. I complained to him about the lack of professionalism in and out of the shop. He then asked me if I did not encourage the unprofessional part. I said I did let it be known that I liked him and he took full advantage of that. He said he didn’t doubt that. Reeling, I texted back on the friend that texted on my tattoo artist’s behalf on how he is later that day. I get a reply stating he’s fine and just needs to rest. My final reply was that I’m glad but I can no longer deny that the personal experience shared with him has soured my tattoo journey. I was looking forward to get this piece done and over with so that I can never have to see him again. I says that I was sorry for whatever happened to him but it doesn’t excuse his poor and immature behavior with me, that left me feeling used and taken advantage of. I never got a reply back. I didn’t expect one. I’m relieved that I don’t have to see him again. It was disappointing, to say the least, and I hope that I won’t have trouble getting this piece done out of state. My next artist will be a female.

  • Alan August 15, 2015

    Hi Amy,

    Happy to hear that it at least sounds like you are able to move on and learn from the experience. In my opinion too, there is a difference between a mixed signal and contradicting behavior. Example, if I cared for you and you texted me that you are in the hospital there should be no real difference in my action whether I am in-person with you or not. Basically, I will respond as promptly as possible.

    A mixed signal would be more along the lines of like say one day you made a meal where a person kept eating so much which you interpreted as they love it. You then do the same thing the next day and they don’t touch it. Like there, they initially didn’t eat it because they loved it per se but rather they were starving. Like that is what I would view more as a mixed signal where it’s more about how you interpreted one’s actions.

    But when it comes to things like responding in the above with that type of stipulation it’s more clear cut I feel. Especially when you two became very close with each other.

    About discouraging you to not seek closure or an apology I actually encourage you to say your piece, which it sounds like you did, but don’t obsess in forcing an answer out of him if that makes sense as to me it seems like he used you to a certain extent and knew what he was doing.

    This might be a crazy example, but imagine someone is up in the court stands for wronging you or close one and all you can think of is “Why” as you scold him non stop which he refuses to say anything about it. Like there, I would fully encourage you to say your piece to him but don’t rely on him to be your support as if he is going to hug you and all after and admit all wrong doing. That is what I mean like there you need to be asking others who you are close with and trust for that.

    Hopefully your tattoo will be great after at least. 🙂

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