Always a silent way
Livi Asks:
Hello Alan!
here is another pisces man, he got suddenly distant because he felt me cold once and he said he thought I was in an hard moment (that was true but I wanted him close) so he wanted to leave me alone for a while to let me solve my problems………. saying this to me after 2 months……. before he was telling me he had troubles to solve…. when I texted him he was answering though but rarerly him first.
I decided to declare my feeling and before I asked him to tell me what he was feeling for me… but he was not clear… several times… after I said him that I am in love and the answer I ve got back is: mostly me too I think.. so I freaked out a bit and I said that I understood what he was saying clearly… (that he was not in love) but he was annoyed by it saying just: so yes if u think u understand then!
Have been almost 5 days without no calls and texts.. I don’t know what to think.. why everytime for u is better silence than discussions????
why not saying things instead.Thanks alan and sorry I wronged the section before ?
Livi,
Based on what you wrote I would personally say he felt like you trapped him in a corner with no way out. For myself as an example, I prefer to have things happen naturally and organically. Example, when the time is right and we feel just so close with each other then things like say a kiss will happen. However, to come out and say “I love you. Do you love me?” without this type of build-up is very awkward. I would attest it to the equivalent of someone giving you a gift where you have yet to fully open it. They are then already asking and giving you that look of “Do you love it? You love it right?”
Like there, it may very well be true that they don’t “love” it per se, but because they haven’t had to time to fully unwrap the gift and digest everything to make a clear analysis to say yes or no they are kind of put on the spot. So imagine like here he felt he only unwrapped the present half way where you then implied that you know what he is thinking where he doesn’t love it. To me I would agree with you in a sense that he was “not there yet” in terms of love. With the gift example though it wouldn’t be unusual for a person to then not want to open the gift further and just walk away. It’s too darn awkward as like there it is essentially putting the person in a position where they must say yes even if it isn’t 100% true.
Ideally I would say you should have re-affirmed to him it is okay if he isn’t feeling the same thing you are yet right after. Again with the gift example, it wouldn’t be unusual if the person responded by saying don’t ever buy them gifts again rather than talking about how they feel.
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