Confused about a Pisces
Maya Asks:
Okay. so here is the deal, i met this guy in my college in one of classes instantly i found him attractive and well sweet. He would study with me and all the time, one day i took a chance and asked him for coffee, we had a at time talking about philosophy and art and so on. We ended up dating, however one day he let me know that he did not know that dating led to relationships -_- (yeah i know).
So fast forward we decided to stay friends but he keeps asking me out still. getting jealous when i talk to other guys. So again being really up front i asked him if he likes me,he answered yes and that he enjoys my company. Yet again does want a relationship. I am just very confused on what he wants. Every time i hang out with him, we talk about poetry, philosophy and he gives me this look like he wants me but then makes no freaking effort.
Maya,
It feels like one of those scenarios where he is simply not used to having a “bond” with a woman. As a result, he likes it and doesn’t want to lose it of course. At the same time, it would be something that needs to build up to love once it clicks at a certain point. Confusing? I’ll try to use an example.
Pretend you just walked into a garden that you have been in plenty of times. For the most part you are contempt with it as it relaxes you and all. One day this little cub comes up to you and it seems like it is alone. You have never seen or interacted with a cub before and so you kind of take it day by day. As you interact with it you start to care for it like you would as if it was your own house pet in many ways. However, to you this is like a “wild animal” where you don’t really know how to deal with it and so at the end of the day you leave it there and go home.
As time goes by you repeat the cycle. The cub is confused as it wants you to take it home. As much as you like petting it and all and how it makes you feel you are not in a position or state of mind to say take it home like it is actually your own. So the cub is confused. One day when you went to the garden the cub assumes you just don’t like it that much and so it goes to another person. While sitting in the garden now you miss the bond you have had with that cub.
It gives you “signals” that you can take it home where it will be all yours, but in your mind you didn’t think that simply giving each other some nice energy and company together while you are at the garden necessarily means you would like adopt it. Like I would imagine there, it would take a lot more time and knowledge on your part before you would ever consider actually taking it home.
Nor sure if that was confusing or made things more clear for you. But to me his mindset is kind of similar. I think. He basically has a lack of knowledge and experience about the things he is feeling and the whole notion of a relationship in general. It kind of reminds me of what people say game gameshow quizzes. It’s easy if you actually know the answer. Don’t assume he understands things like emotions better than you as an example. Although, I must admit it’s a little awkward if he specifically into things like philosophy.