I’m In Love With A Pisces

Nelle Asks:

Hi allan,

I’ve read almost all comments here just to give me an idea or might even have a similar situation with a pisces man but no luck so I’m asking you instead since I generally like how you enlighten people about your sign.

I’ve known a pisces man for 2 yrs now and he used to be my direct supervisor for 6 months. During those 6 mos working with him directly we usually talk a lot about anything not even work related. We even go out with our colleagues have drinks, lunch, dinner, movies, any team building activities. There’s this instant when we we’re at a birthday party and he intentionally wipe my face with chocolate icing and noone declared a food fight then the celebrant joined us.I am very touchy because I want it to be clear that I like him more than a friend. I usually put my arms around his shoulder, I touched his earlobe or his face when we are being playful with each other. It’s a constant banter relationship which I really find sweet but still confusing . I told him I like him but he never really verbalize if he feels the same.

We are not working together anymore since I left the company but we still see each other the usual lunch out and movie stuff and most of the time with a third wheel – usually one of my girl friends because I’m not even sure if he is comfortable having lunch with just the two of is or watch movie as if we’re like dating. I told him I love him on his birthday, that I’m always there for him no matter what. I’m just confused because he never really said he likes me too. He just asked my opinion on what car to buy and he bought the car I suggested. He got the mobile number I suggested for him when he got his mobile plan. He was even confused whether to go for note4 or experia z2 but I suggested experia so that’s the phone he got for his plan. He let’s me pick a perfume for him claims he got colds and couldn’t smell well. This perfume situation is also confusing, I picked one of the scents and said I like it for him and he replied with how about (our common friend) if she likes the scent too. I mean if he likes me more than just a friend should my opinion only matters to him. By the way he ended purchasing the scent I liked.

Nelle,

Spelled my name wrong. 🙁 To me it sounds like he is very into you but simply doesn’t want to be the one to take initiative. For whatever reason, he seems unsure and afraid to commit to the idea of being in relationship with you. I guess you can say he is stuck “evaluating” you which can take forever and in some ways is unrealistic in the search to find “the perfect one”.
Like here, you can hang around with him until he sees that one life event or character trait in you that makes him want to take the plunge with you. Just to give an example on how long or frustrating that can be, it could be a trait that he wants to see in people is how they help others. Therefore, he will continue to be around you while waiting until an event occurs.

Imagine you are in swimming pool and there is a child struggling and crying to complete a simple routine. He is waiting for that specific moment to see if you can communicate and nurture a child to succeed as his way of saying “This girl has the heart of gold I am looking for.” Now that he specifically saw that, he will jump in the pool with you and take initiative in other aspects.

Again, I can understand how that may be painfully frustrating. On the other hand, imagine here you are still in the swimming pool and there is no scenario like that. Based on what you wrote so far, I am inclined to say you can just pull him in as to me it’s pretty evident he already knows that you like him more as a friend. From there, you just have to appeal to the other aspect that makes him like/trust you for him to get out of his comfort zone. Yes, it has to be that blunt and aggressive I feel as oppose to “Hey, come here.”

The other way of looking at the perfume opinion statement is that if he likes you but is afraid to take initiative then in his mind this takes the pressure off him that you know he is “evaluating you” so that he can continue to do so in “stealth” mode. Let’s be honest. If people to a certain extent know that they are being “evaluated” then they will most likely not be themselves to try and impress. To me, it seems like he just wants the true you in the most natural way as possible.