Insecure pisces man
AquaWoman Asks:
Hi I’m an Aquarius female i like this pisces guy who gets me confused we were Facebook friends he’s my senior and already graduate..he kinda liked me but i just saw him as a friend. .he started pursuing me the i gave him my contact number things were all good but he was having problems with his family and job…he said might be we are meant to be with each other i gave him a chance he told me he loved me and i did the same…after some lovey dovey moments he changed i dont know why very distant always talked about the future plays mind games so i tried to ask him then where do i stand in his life when hes blocking me…
i forgot to mention he’s been hurt in past and me too..his gf cheated on him now he cant have a relationship with me…i was hurt but i left him…no contact for a month i feel likes he’s been taking online dating advice after a month he just texted me why you didnt wish me on my birthday and i said u didn’t either..he never opened up talks to me in a way for like two three exchange of msgs in a day then disappears. ..so i did the same ..i had unfriended him since the day he said he cant commit so every time he sends me a text first. ..
i got frustrated with his indecisiveness so i told him to leave ye said sure …after some time he responds back like yeah you dont understand me…then again the same cycle starts i know he isn’t seeing anyone and I’m not interested i told him already…but then he still texted me so i decided to talk to him face to face because i cant take this…. he says yeah ok but I’m a bit busy …so i said ok let me know when you can…he said ok…i didn’t say anything after few days he says i look fat in my dp on whatsapp (jokingly ) i replied in bored way like no i don’t he texted me with a rply yeah u do…
i again have him a cold shoulder ( i don’t ) after that he just said ok…so i asked him you don’t take me seriously dont u…he asked:how? So i just said nothing. he :tell me …if you wont tell me how i will come to know i replied sarcastically he laughed like I’m a little kid ? He says why ami always in a bad mood…i didnt say a word …then after an hour he text me again …my name with a question mark … i didnt rply he posts sad things on his wall…is very low profile for now…was at the hospital like a month ago hit his car by accident .. then again had dehydration. ..
i dont know what he wants…always says he’s scared of being hurt and want time to establish his career..but i cant trust him..I’m a very blunt person i told him nah i don’t trust you a bit…I’m not going to give you an advantage of a gf without a comitment. …i made my self very clear and i want him to doso.. can you help me with the situation. ..thanks
AquaWoman,
From what you wrote, if I am understanding it correctly as it is hard to follow, it sounds like he is fundamentally looking for an outlet for his unresolved anger/hurt in life. Basically a glass half empty mindset in many ways where he is expecting you to do the worst and so one constantly tests and anticipates for the worst. Kind of a toxic mindset.
With that said I don’t really understand fully as to what you are asking for in the end. Because in my mind you have written to me here saying that you are a blunt person and you want like a commitment from him or no deal. So with that said isn’t your answer clear there where that means you yourself should just leave because in many ways it sounds like you can’t stand him or support him in the way he needs if that makes sense? Entertaining his remarks isn’t leaving as an example as with the context of this situation, if I am understanding it correctly, is an invitation in his mind to pursue you.
Stereotypically speaking it would be like the guy trying to ask the girl but keeps getting rejected. However, she keeps telling him to “do this” or “come back” with that which again is an invitation despite her saying “go away” in many ways. If she truly wanted him to go away she would just flat out ignore him without spending any energy whatsoever. I feel that is what you need to do if that is what you want. Otherwise you would have to be willing to put in the work to try and “repair” this guy as they say.