Will he come back?
Suzy Asks:
Hi Alan 🙂
I just recently came across your site and I liked what you had to say about the oh so confusing Pisces men lol okay so basically, I met this Pisces guy almost four months back via social media and we hit it off from day one, we actually spoke for 11hours on the phone! ( I know, that’s insane lol ) and everything was fine, we had our silly fights and indifference but nothing we didn’t work out…we live in different countries, he made plans to come meet me but backed out on the last minute…he always said to me he has major trust issue, and he’s been hurt a lot in his past by women etc but that ever since I’ve come into his life he’s felt different in a good way and he’s able to trust again.
Few days back I told him something about my past, something that happened 10 years back…it was a past relationship I had with a much older and rich guy…when he heard that he went crazy, and started cussing me and saying that I’m just like the rest of them and basically made it seem like I just want his money or whatever….and he didn’t speak to me for two days and then sent me this message saying that money had a role to play in me wanting to be with a much older guy when at the time I was considerably younger ( I was 18 at the time nothing illegal ) and that I have no right to tell him how he feels about me, and that I apparently said at one point that he can’t teach me anything cause I feel I know everything and he said that was very insulting even for a joke, and for all these reasons he feels that this relationship isn’t for him and he ended the message by saying sorry and wished me best for my future…
So now I’m really confused, cause after everything he and I been through, all the conversations we’ve had, he knows I’m nothing like what he said….so I’m wondering is he just angry and needs time? Or is it really over? It’s been just one day since he sent me that message and I at the time replied and said I’m so sorry for hurting him in anyway and it was never my intention but he hasn’t replied and I haven’t contacted him since he sent me that message…will he come back or is it really over?
Suzy,
I feel this comes down to personal experience on how many times in life he felt that he has been burnt, so to speak. Speaking for myself, I have been taken advantage of lot by people where while you think I would quickly learn from it the lack of experience would make me say “Okay, not everyone can be this way” sort of deal.
Like saying, while the first person could take advantage of me like seven times as I really need to be sure they are truly “bad”, just from life experience anyone similar won’t have that same opportunity. The same would apply for him as I am not sure how many times he has been taken advantage of.
I kind of hate to say it, but based on the way you kicked things off and how it ended in an extremely emotional way something like a long true to heart letter would at least get him to talk to you. A true to heart way you feel while addressing ways he can assure that you can never use him in the way he feels you potentially would. I say I kind of hate saying it because it’s an opportunistic way for people with bad intentions to take advantage of people.
If you are extremely genuine with him and believe in it though, I think that’s what you need to do. One thing I would note though is that there may be an extreme difference in maturity and mindset between you two. The example would be him not being able to teach you anything comment. Stuff like that is probably more rampant on his mind now to classify you as “just like everyone else” and you would have to show that you don’t think like that anymore. Unless you do of course.
Is it really over? Again, I am not sure how many times he has been burnt. But I think it’s more on you at the moment because he is simply extremely insecure. If you haven’t changed in anyway either such as with the comment above then what reason does he have to think differently about you at the moment? Straight forward in many ways when you think about it.